Tag Archives: Belieber

Mother Speaks

I heard the voice of my mother, calling to me as if from a long way off.
Last night, as I was dropping off to sleep, I heard her call.

“Hello? Hello?”

That was it.

The screen of my telephone was lit up on my bedside table and then nothing. The phone went dark again.

I lay in the darkness listening to the Belieber in the apartment above me move things around, boxes containing the weight of her world.

This is the first time I have been able to understand the voices from my phone.



Waking up with Justin Bieber – Its so overated!


I awoke this morning to the sounds of some tragic and fatal accident wafting through my room.

I thought I had died and gone to hell sometime during the nocturnal hours. Turns out I was not so far off, which became more apparent as the morning progressed.

Upon exiting my apartment at 7:12 am sharp for my work commute, I was met by a female teenager of nondescript age (they all look 16 and drugged to me), wearing a T-shirt depicting some young singer who the teenager blurted out was a certain Justin Bieber (oh and that she now lives in the apartment above mine).


And, she continued, she’s going to marry this Bieber boy and have his love child.

– In the apartment above? I asked.

– No, like at his mansion, like. Ok?

I was slightly relieved at this piece of good news.

– Will you take his god-awful music with you?

– In my heart, she said.

So there is the off-chance that she may be relocating soon.

She is, what I have discovered, a Belieber: a group ( a large one at that) of teenage and not so teenage girls (and some confused boys) who all think they are going to marry Bieber and have his love child(ren)

Heaven help us all.

Especially with a hair cut like his.

Suddenly I found myself longing for the days of the “Lesbians”.