Monthly Archives: July 2011

I threw a brick through a Window

Maybe not a brick, but rather a potted plant which I dropped from the third floor fire escape onto a car parked in the alley below.

The rear window of an early 1980′s Pontiac Trans Am, metallic red, 15″ wheels, no plates, to be exact.

Stupid fucker. That will teach him to push drugs in my “hood”.

It was all due to a confluence of circumstances. I put it down to a bad experience in a hospital elevator at the age of five. Suffice to say, I ended up in the morgue one hour after getting lost and am now sure that all elevators lead to dead people. Hence the use of the steps.

Another contributing factor is that the apartments of both  Mrs Kirchmann and Mrs Mendelsohn do not have balconies and their old person’s desire to grow and nurture potted plants drives them out onto the fire escape landings on the third and fourth floors respectively.

The last factor is that all pushers are inherently dumb greedy little shits.

So, I might run like a girl, but at least I don’t have a potted plant on the rear window of my car, asshole!